Perhaps we live in a mechanical universe.
Perhaps we simply dissolve into a pure conservation of energy that cannot be destroyed.
Perhaps there is no Oz behind the curtain.
And perhaps it doesn't actually matter what actually matters because we each live, breathe, and die as one expression of the multitudinous cosmos.
I was raised by my adoring mother who is a carrier of the Pachakuti Mesa Shamanic Tradition. I have spent countless hours in contemplation, walking for miles at 3 o'clock in the morning. I have listened to the ancient silence of desert canyons and taken note of countless serendipities. I've witnessed violent men collapse under years of suppressed grief and silent women scream their fury into the void. Between these consciousness-expanding experiences, I have dabbled in Ancient Chinese texts, oracles of divination, psychics, sweat lodges, and more.
Admittedly, I have not personally experienced irrefutable evidence that there is truly any intelligent design in an Unseen World. But in my time, in my conversations with the most straight-laced strangers, I always make plenty of space to open the floor to these experiences - and I have heard enough from them to believe through my own sense and senses, that there are far greater forces at play in our realm than we pretend to comprehend. It is a much more enjoyable world for me to live in. For some, an omnipotent force is deeply unsettling or even inconsequential. For others, it takes some of the weight off of the decisions we have to make day-to-day by trusting in something greater than themselves.
We all see what we look for. I look for the tiniest of cosmic winks and plays on probability. I don't look at people, I see into them. I often find that I can unearth things they have long-since buried and quietly forgotten about. They often find that it often does not look the way they remember it. And perhaps it wasn't so bad with the perspective of time.
THE HEALING POWER OF NATURE
During my tenure as a wilderness therapy guide, I spent over three years in the field: 555 days sleeping under a tarp in desert heat and foot-deep snow. I hiked hundreds of miles with teens and adults searching for their way, struggling with personality, cognitive, mood, addiction disorders, and more.
Walking together meant we were immersed in group therapy together. We had to develop social/emotional skills together-and fast. In the process, we laughed, cried, screamed, broke sticks, and cried some more in the cradling arms of Mother Nature. From an apprentice, I soon became the longest-standing guide on my shift, mentoring the up-and-coming senior guides to push the boundaries of what they thought they were capable of holding, of growing, of creating in their teams.
Before wilderness therapy, I threw everything I had at an Outward Bound Instructor Development Course. I was all-in immediately after completing my 2,000 hours of service in inner city schools with AmeriCorps. On day 2 of a 52-day course, my knee popped and my leg buckled. But I was determined to finish, so I did, limping to the Alaskan shore on our final day in a knee brace. At that time, that was the closest I'd ever felt to living my dream. The mountains were too vast, the trees too boisterous with valley gusts, the thunderclaps too energizing to throw in the towel and wonder "What if?"
At the end of our 10-mile run (well, I hobbled) to the coast, I had no idea if my knee would recover, nor if I could ever be a guide. And for the next year, I wavered about whether or not I made the right decision. Shortly after, I toured the country with a friend I made on-course, touching each of the 4 corners of the United States, and landed in Florida to recuperate.
After holding multiple day and night jobs and slow healing, I made my way back to Colorado for redemption. While I excelled as a guide, the lifestyle is hard to sustain. Rotating in and out of the field for 8 days at a time every Wednesday from hyper-structured to complete freedom is heavenly at first. After many years, it became more challenging to maintain relationships outside of my insular cohort of co-workers. After all that I'd contributed and accomplished, I planned my exit with months of ceremonies dedicated to myself and others.
MY COACHING APPROACH
I build relationships with my clients based on support, inquiry, challenge, curiosity, non-judgement, creativity, and stranger-than-fiction instigation. My approach combines a structured methodology with an adaptable design, drawing from my extensive experience and research to help you outgrow your current goals and reach for the ones you have yet to imagine. I believe in a "gradual release" method, offering more guidance and skills up front as you progressively internalize and apply them on your own, slowly becoming more acquainted and comfortable with the next version of yourself.
WILDERNESS | RESEARCH | COACHING
With over 10,000 hours of personal, professional, coaching, and therapeutic development in both 1:1 and group settings, I have the expertise to guide you on your journey towards personal growth, transformation, and integration for lasting change.
8,000+ hours guiding teens, young adults, and their families through the rugged landscapes of Utah and Colorado while teaching them comprehensive therapeutic skill sets in coping and communication skills, ceremony, and reflection in both individual and group settings..
2,000 hours of service with AmeriCorps in under-resourced schools with extensive personal and professional development in education, and DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion).
200 hours coaching individuals and couples into healthier, more fulfilling relationships with themselves and each other.
120 credit hours of research psychology at New College of Florida culminating in a dissertation on Self-Compassion in LGBTQIA+ Individuals, later presented at Columbia University.